第30部分(第5/9 頁)

hearing　in　early　April。　Anne　cringed　at　the　thought。

She　was　tired　of　reliving　the　accident；　tired　of　the　horror；　the

helplessness；　the　anger。　She　would　love　Jeff　until　the　day　she　died；　but

she　needed　to　live　until　then。

And　there　was　Mitch。　Something　had　begun　to　change…in　her　life；　in　her

outlook；　in　her　attitude　toward　him。　He　was　being　real。　When　she　was

low；　she　thought　of　him　and　felt　better。　The　prospect　of　seeing　him　for

the　New　Year's　holiday　became　part　of　her　daily　routine。

It　worried　her　a　little。　She　wondered　if　she　was　building　him　up　to　be

something　he　wasn't。　She　remembered　him　as　being　smart；　solid；　and

strong；　as　offering　protection　and　fort；　stimulation　and　challenge。

At　times　he　seemed　larger　than　life；　too　large　for　a　plane　crash　to

kill。　She　half…suspected　he　would　look　at　the　burning　debris　and　walk

away　unscathed。

It　occurred　to　her　that　after　building　him　up；　she　might　be　in　for　a

letdown　when　she　saw　him　again。　She　figured　she　had　until　New　Year's　to

get　a　grip　on　herself。

As　it　happened；　she　was　wrong。

Alexander　Robie；　the　professor　for　whom　she　did　the　ongoing　grant　work；

organized　a　dinner　for　the　seven　people　involved　with　the　project。　There

were　two　secretaries；　three　research　assistants；　Alex　and　a　colleague　of

his；　and　Anne。　Thumbing　his　nose　at　the　usual　budget　restraints；　Alex

rese