第32部分(第3/8 頁)

　I　had　more　colour　and　more　flesh；　more　life；　more　vivacity；　because　I　had　brighter　hopes　and　keener　enjoyments。

“Evening　approaches；”　said　I；　as　I　looked　towards　the　window。　“I　have　never　heard　Mr。　Rochester’s　voice　or　step　in　the　house　to…day；　but　surely　I　shall　see　him　before　night：　I　feared　the　meeting　in　the　morning；　now　I　desire　it；　because　expectation　has　been　so　long　baffled　that　it　is　grown　impatient。”

When　dusk　actually　closed；　and　when　Adèle　left　me　to　go　and　play　in　the　nursery　with　Sophie；　I　did　most　keenly　desire　it。　I　listened　for　the　bell　to　ring　below；　I　listened　for　Leah　ing　up　with　a　message；　I　fancied　sometimes　I　heard　Mr。　Rochester’s　own　tread；　and　I　turned　to　the　door；　expecting　it　to　open　and　admit　him。　The　door　remained　shut；　darkness　only　came　in　through　the　window。　Still　it　was　not　late；　he　often　sent　for　me　at　seven　and　eight　o’clock；　and　it　was　yet　but　six。　Surely　I　should　not　be　wholly　disappointed　to…　night；　when　I　had　so　many　things　to　say　to　him！　I　wanted　again　to　introduce　the　subject　of　Grace　Poole；　and　to　hear　what　he　would　answer；　I　wanted　to　ask　him　plainly　if　he　really　believed　it　was　she　who　had　made　last　night’s　hideous　attempt；　and　if　so；　why　he　kept　her　wickedness　a　secret。　It　little　mattered　whether　my　curiosity　irritated　him；　I　knew　the　pleasure　of　vexing　and　soothing　him　by　turns；　it　was　one　I　chiefly　delighted　in；　and　a　sure　instinct　always　prevented　me　from　going　too　far；　beyond　the　verge　of　provocation　I　never　vent